Weddings are not just a union of two individuals but a beautiful bond sprouts between two families. Among the Iyengar community, weddings hold a special and are a multi-day affair. Rooted in Vedic customers, these ceremonies are a blend of sacred rituals and familial warmth.
The Kasi Yaatra, the Sapthapadi or the Sambandhmale are some of the meaningful traditions that reflect the community’s deep reverence for tradition. Whether you are a part of the family or an eager observer, an Iyengar wedding promises an experience filled with joy and beauty.
Explore the intricate rituals and their significance that make an Iyengar wedding an extraordinary celebration of love and heritage.
Pre-wedding Rituals
Pandalkal
This is a pre-wedding ritual and the first ritual in an Iyengar wedding. Bamboo poles or banana trees hold Pandalkal and the first pole is worshipped as they consider it a deity. It is always a way of announcing to the neighbourhood the good news of the wedding.
Nichayatartham
The engagement ceremony in TamBrahm weddings. Lord Ganesha is worshipped to mark the beginning of the ceremony and the bride and groom and gifted new attire by their in-laws-to-be. Garlands are exchanged between the families and the bride and groom exchange rings as a promise of forever commitment. Nichayatartham is usually a few months before the wedding or sometimes on the day of the wedding.
During the same ceremony, the Lagna Pathrigai or the wedding invitation is read by the priest. He announces 3 generations of names of the bride and groom’s ancestors along with the wedding date and venue.
Kasi Yathirai
A dramatic ritual that happens just before the wedding ceremony is the Kasi Yathirai. The groom pretends to take off to Kashi, a holy place, to take Sanyas (asceticism) after completing the Brahmacharya. He carries with him his belongings—umbrella, hand fan, bamboo, footwear, etc. The bride’s father convinces the groom to tie the knot to his daughter while highlighting the bright side of married life.
Malai Matral
The bride and groom exchange garlands three times that are handed over to them by their maternal uncles. The ceremony is made fun by making it slightly difficult for the couple to exchange garlands. They are often lifted up by the family members so the other person cannot put the garland as easily. A ceremony that is most looked forward to.
Sambandhmale
Also known as Oonjal, is a swing on which the couple sits and ladies surround them and sing Laali praising the couple. Like all rituals, this also holds a significance that the couple’s marriage will be as strong as the chains of the swing no matter the fluctuations in life.
Main Wedding Ceremonies
Nalungu
The bride’s and groom’s families host a Nalungu ceremony for them. They make a paste of sandalwood and Kumkum and apply it to the hands of the bride and groom.
Vara Pooja
The bride’s side of the family welcomes the groom and his family with garland and a variety of fruits. The bride is gifted a saree from the groom’s family which she wears on the wedding day.
Kanyadanam
Kanyadanam symbolises the formal ‘giving away’ of the bride by her family entrusting the groom. With the Vedic chants in the air, the father gives the daughter’s hand to the groom while the mother pours water over the hand signifying the ‘giving away’.
Mangalya Dharanam
This ritual is right after Kanyadanam. The groom’s parents present a 9-yard silk saree to the bride which she wears for this ritual. The groom then ties Mangalya around the neck of the bride with three knots. The first two knots are tied by the groom and the third by the groom’s sister.
Saptapadi
Saptapadi is where the bride and groom take seven steps around the sacred fire. Each step represents a vow, a promise to uphold the essence of love, respect and commitment in their married life. These vows are rooted in tradition and form the foundation of a lifelong relationship.
Arundhati Nakshatra
Arundhati Nakshatra, a ceremony performed right after Saptapadi. Arundhati Nakshastra – signifying Arundhati and Vasishta, the two celestial bodies that have signified an ideal bond for years. The couple look upon the two stars for blessings and in awe. They aspire to be able to replicate the bond the stars possess, throughout their marital life.
Post-wedding Ceremonies
Gruhapravesha
Gruhapravesha means entering the house and marks the bride’s first steps into her marital home. Amidst joyous songs and blessings, the bride gently kicks over a kalash filled with rice which signifies prosperity.
Kattu Sadam
It is a ritual where the bride’s family gives the groom’s family parting gifts of food and condiments. They pack items like dal, rice, pickles, coconut rice, tamarind rice, etc., for their journey back. This ritual is a day after the wedding ceremony.
Samandi Virundu
Once all the rituals are completed, the groom’s family invites the bride’s family over for lunch. This tradition signifies that their bond will remain strong and will be carried forward for generations to come.
These timeless traditions are a reminder of the values that bind families together, creating memories that last a lifetime. As the couple embarks on their journey together, blessed by their loved ones and guided by centuries-old customs, an Iyengar wedding becomes not just an event but a celebration of life itself.
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